Fyre Festival to Make Almost Certainly Ill-Fated Comeback

Billy McFarland has announced the Fyre Festival sequel that nobody in the world asked for.

In 2017, the debut of a boutique gathering called Fyre Festival ended so catastrophically that internet commentators would call every event facing a minor hiccup “the next Fyre Fest” in the years to follow. They can now reserve that title for the actual next Fyre Fest. The newly announced sophomore edition promises to be highly controversial at best, and a complete disaster if it even gets far enough to be such.

Billy McFarland, the brains (or lack thereof) behind the brand, announced via Instagram on Sunday that tickets had gone on sale for Fyre Festival 2. In a Tuesday update, he shared that the first ticket “drop” had sold out. Take it with a grain of salt, as the source is a man who was arrested and charged for wire fraud in connection to the first incarnation of the event.

“It has been the absolute wildest journey to get here, and it really all started during a seven-month stint in solitary confinement,” McFarland said in his Sunday contender for worst-ever festival announcement video. “I wrote out this 50-page plan of how I would take this overall interest and demand for Fyre, and how I would take my ability to bring people from around the world together, to make the impossible happen.”

McFarland partnered with rapper Ja Rule on the original Fyre Festival, which was set to take place on the Bahamian island of Great Exuma with headliners like Major Lazer, Blink-182, and Lil Yachty. When ticket holders arrived on April 27, however, they were met with garbage-covered premises, almost no shelter, and cheese sandwiches that went viral for how greatly they differed from the culinary offerings promised by promoters.

At the time of writing, a whopping six ticket tiers remain to be tapped for Fyre Festival 2. It will supposedly take place somewhere in the Caribbean Ocean on Friday, December 6, 2024, but we wouldn’t hold our breath if we were you.